“Your life is a learning process – you can only become wiser from learning. Sometimes you might have to attract making a painful mistake to learn something important, but after the mistake you have far greater wisdom. Wisdom cannot be bought with money- it can only be acquired through living life. With wisdom comes strength, courage, knowing, and an ever-increasing peace.”
– Rhonda Byrne
This was my Secret Scroll that gets emailed to me through the website thesecret.tv. This is my quote of the day. This is the optimism I am going to use in my situation. I am Learning. I am learning something now that requires me to struggle like this. There is a reason for me to be here in this shit.
Yesterdays post was very real, very hard, very honest. I am in a bad spot. I had a follower comment on my last post and she said, thank you for your honesty. This touched me. For some reason I was supposed to write that blog yesterday. Maybe it will help someone else not feel so alone. Maybe it will attract someone to help me. Maybe it was a way for me to get my feelings out of my head so I can create space for positive thoughts. I don’t know. But I feel that that comment made me feel better. If I can feel better by being honest, that’s a positive thing! I am learning that it is OK to be honest about how you feel. It is not wrong or bad to feel this way. It is a learning process.
The list I made yesterday I think is a good start to moving forward. I only got two of seven things done (I had a softball game, but your right no excuses) but it holds me accountable for my shit. It keeps me in check. Keeps me learning.
Today I woke up and made my list, and at the top of the list is my goal of looking at the bright side of everything that happens today. Today Rent is due and we were able to pay rent. Bright Side: we have a home for another month! Thank GOD! Can we eat this week, no, but we can stay out of the street! That is important! One accomplishment at a time.
I still have my list. I am going to accomplish more on it today than yesterday. I am learning something, something important, something big. I am more than this. I am bigger than this. There is something BIG in store for me. I am not just a receptionist. I am so much more!
List = Change. It is not much of a plan but at least I have one.