I sit here today dwelling in the past. I miss Colorado. I miss having a home, a good job, good food, and places to shop. I miss my mountains. I miss my friends. I keep saying what if I stayed, what if I took a different job, what if.
I cannot change the past. I cannot re make decisions. Unfortunately I cannot go back to Colorado. All I have is what is in front of me. I can choose to dwell in what it is not, or strive to find what it is.
I keep saying once I find a different job I will be happy, or once we buy a home I will be happy, or once we have money I will be happy. But that is not what happiness is about. Happiness is about being happy no matter the circumstances. If you keep finding happiness in things you will never find it. There will always be something you dont have. I need to find a way to be happy now. Would money help, YES, but it is not the cause of my unhappiness. I was unhappy when I had money.
I dont know the answer. I dont have a secret trick. I just know that I need to be happy in the now. I cant change the past, but I can help shape the future. I am choosing to be positive and make the most of what we have here. Just today I had a day where I wish I was back at home.
A Girl and Her Thoughts 
Whenever I get thoughts like this I try to remember why I left in the first place. I’m guessing there was a reason you left Colorado? Try to think back at that time you went and the excitement of starting or trying something new. It usually works for me 🙂
Life doesn’t always make sense, and sometimes we need to go through these moments to figure out what the next step will be. Most important is to try as much as you possibly can to stay in the now. Thinking of the past, whether it’s good or bad, will only make you feel worse.
But hey, it’s okay to have down days sometimes, too!
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